“It’s just a child,” is the main excuse for some mothers when their child does something. And if she herself has done something wrong, there is another equally popular phrase: “I’m a mother.” But such expressions usually only cause irritation and discontent among those around her. How to behave correctly if you and your child find yourself in a delicate situation according to the rules of etiquette:
About the request to skip the queue
In principle, if a mother with a child asks those around her to let her through without waiting in line, this does not violate the framework of decency. The main thing is that she is ready to accept the refusal (after all, people are different) and does not make a fuss about it. But if a woman herself decided that everyone should let her through and rushes forward, pushing those around her, this is ugly.
About talking to colleagues about children
If your colleague also has a child and is happy to discuss various children's topics, you are exchanging experiences, there is nothing wrong with that. For example, in polyclinics, mothers often do this. However, you need to understand that such conversations are not pleasing to everyone. The details of your child's physiological processes are of little concern to others, especially if they are eating or drinking at this time. In any case, there is no need to discuss such issues loudly.
About pots and diapers in public places
For some time, a photo has been circulating on the Internet of a woman giving a child a drink cup in a fast food cafe, and he pees in front of a surprised audience. Such things are unacceptable! Maybe this picture doesn't disgust the mother, but what does it matter to others? Even if the baby wants to go to the toilet in nature or in a park, step aside. This doesn't mean that you need to go completely masked, but you are obliged to go to a secluded place. Not everyone is pleased to see such an action.
The same rule applies to diapers, especially if your child has not just peed, but has made things bigger. The smell quickly becomes noticeable. Be sure to go to the bathroom and deal with the issue there.
About cartoons and music in a public place
Children should not watch cartoons or listen to music without headphones when there are other people around. If parents do not follow this elementary rule, it is quite natural that there will be someone who can give them a reprimand. Moms and dads need to understand that you can not make your child a burden for others. Their task is to minimize the child's whims, and if they cannot do this, then perhaps it is worth temporarily leaving the public place or finding a way to be alone to calm the child.
About aunts and uncles
“If you misbehave, your aunt will take you with her,” says mom and glances in the direction of some completely unfamiliar woman. Such things are unacceptable for two reasons. First, you shift the blame from yourself to others: mom is good, and “aunt” is bad.
Secondly, constantly addressing all adults as “aunts” and “uncles” can confuse a child, blurring the concepts of “acquaintance” and “stranger”. In the future, he may simply cease to feel real danger from strangers. Ideally, unfamiliar adults should be addressed using respectful, neutral forms of address (for example, “excuse me”, “ma'am/sir”), and acquaintances – by name and patronymic or agreed forms. And only very close people should be called “aunts” and “uncles”.
About mothers with strollers
The rules are the same for everyone: people get off the transport first and only then other passengers get on. There are no exceptions to this.
Here, both the laws of etiquette and the laws of logic are at work. If a mother with a child needs to get off at the next stop, then, of course, it is better to let everyone else go and only then enter the carriage and stand at the door. When the journey is expected to be long, it is better to enter in the order of the general queue.
It's great when others help — they give up their seat so that a woman can put her stroller in a corner, not in the middle of the car or bus.
The main thing for the mother herself is not to push everyone away. Polite behavior and patience will help avoid misunderstandings, so you should not draw too much attention to yourself or demand special treatment.
About women's locker rooms, toilets and boys
If you take your young son with you to the women's restroom, it is usually less inconvenient than the locker room, since at least there are closed cubicles. However, it is worth remembering the possible discomfort for other visitors. It is better for the father to deal with this issue.
As for women's locker rooms, for example, in the swimming pool, of course, there is no need to bring boys there who have already reached the age when they begin to be aware of gender differences and the privacy of others.
About naked children on the beach
It is always better to take your child to the beach in shorts. This should be done not even for the sake of decency, but for a number of other reasons. Firstly, sensitive areas of the body need protection from direct sunlight. Secondly, there are other children around, and your child may arouse natural curiosity in other children and have a different perception from adults, which can lead to unwanted conversations or inconvenience. Plus, don't forget about hygiene: it's one thing when a toddler who can't walk yet crawls on your bedspread with a bare bottom, and another when a child sits on sand, stones, etc.
About public punishments
Punishing a child in public or having some educational conversations should be done correctly, without swearing or backbiting (and some moms and dads allow themselves such things). You can express your dissatisfaction to her in a stern voice.
It is better not to scold a teenager in front of witnesses, because respect for their own dignity and the opinions of others are especially important to them, and they may react to your criticism with a protest. You need to have preventive conversations with them before going to a public place, or after. If the situation still requires your intervention, make remarks unnoticed by others.
About torn tights and dirty clothes
If your child tears, tears off, or stains something on someone's clothes, you should definitely apologize. It is the parents' responsibility to avoid situations where a child's dirty feet or similar items create inconvenience for others.
To avoid contamination, you can put bags on dirty shoes or find other ways to avoid worrying that the baby will contaminate the people sitting next to you or the seat in the transport. As for the tights torn by the child, a decent person should compensate for their cost. Not everyone will take it, but your task is still to make such an offer. Remember that the responsibility for the child's behavior and possible harm lies with the parents. It is important to raise children and teach them to behave within the framework of decency, understanding that the comfort of others also matters.
Therefore, raising a child is a great responsibility that encompasses not only love and care, but also teaching the rules of behavior in society. Adherence to these simple but important principles of etiquette is not a restriction, but rather the foundation for harmonious coexistence. When parents are respectful of the comfort of others, they set the best example for their children, creating a friendly and understanding environment for everyone. After all, the world becomes a better place when each of us takes care not only of ourselves, but also of those around us.
Джерело: ukr.media
