What is the difference between a thrifty person and a miser? To paraphrase Oscar Wilde, a miser knows the price of everything and values nothing. A miser generally hesitates to spend money, despite the fact that it harms all areas of his life. For him, the only value that matters is the current number on his bank card.
And frugal people live by the principle: “I save where I can, so I can spend where I want.” Healthy saving means finding the best possible price without sacrificing quality so you have more money for the things you really value: family, hobbies, recreation, creating a secure financial future.
Being frugal means being deliberate in your choices. Being stingy means skimping on things even when you can afford to spend money.
And here are the signs that you are turning into a miser.
You avoid special occasions
Birthdays, anniversaries, family holidays, parties with friends – these and other special events will certainly cost you money. But what about the value you get for that money? Communication with loved ones, happiness on the faces of loved ones, after all, the opportunity to have a great rest. All this is worth spending a few thousand on a treat or a gift.
Your health is suffering.
Of course, you can survive on bread and tap water, but you're unlikely to last that long without harming your health.
Maybe you buy the cheapest products that are harmful to your body. Or you don't see a doctor about a health problem because you're sure it will go away on its own. These are all signs of unhealthy money saving.
Your choices harm others
If your frugal lifestyle is being supported by your family members, if your friends often pay for you, it's time to reconsider your approach to money. When you save money at someone else's expense, it's not frugality. It's incredibly rude and ugly.
You are playing the system.
For example, when you go to a cafe for lunch or dinner, you always find that something is wrong with the food or the service. Then you demand that the manager adjust your bill or at least give you a free dessert. Or you buy groceries at a discount with your parents' pension card. You are not breaking the law when you do these things. But you are being terribly stingy.
You borrow, not buy.
If you ask your friends for passwords to paid services or beg someone to order you a product from an online store so you don't have to pay for delivery, it's simply shameful.
The same goes for ordinary, “physical” things that you borrow from friends too often, from your neighbor’s screwdriver to your girlfriend’s cool hair dryer. Regularly using other people’s things shortens their lifespan. Plus, it’s inconvenient for people when they need their own things that you borrowed. If you really need an item more than once every six months, buy your own, don’t be stingy.
You put off necessary purchases.
When you got your first apartment, you bought the cheapest mattress you could find—and 15 years later, you're still sleeping on it.
Your prescription for glasses is a few years out of date. But you tell yourself that your vision is fine, so why spend money on a new pair of glasses?
You refuse to buy new shoes, claiming that you have sentimental attachment to your old sneakers. Meanwhile, your feet hurt from them.
Things wear out. And replacing them can improve not only your mood, but also your health. If this is about you, then it's worth thinking about. After all, you are depriving yourself of the quality of life that you can afford – but for what?
You find it difficult to communicate with friends
It seems like everything they want to do costs money! Why, for example, go to the cinema to see a new film if it will be shown on TV or on free services sooner or later? Even if you just came to visit to talk, you should bring something tasty with you.
On the other hand, you're less and less likely to be invited out. No wonder! Who wants to listen to you scold them for buying an expensive pizza, or watch you make a face at the prices at a coffee shop?
You cling to every penny.
Every time you have to buy something, you spend too much time wondering if you could have saved even more. Suddenly, you should have waited for a sale — even if it's only six months away.
Moreover, you basically doubt every expense: “Does our dog really need this vaccination? It's unlikely that she will ever get rabies.”
And you sometimes lie awake at night thinking about upcoming expenses: “I should probably skip the family holiday this year, especially since my brother got married and my sister had another baby. That's two more presents, plus gas for the trip there and back. I'll just say I have a lot of work to do.”
Don't turn into Scrooge McDuck, sifting through his gold coins by candlelight. Instead, create a working budget that includes, among other things, entertainment, hobbies, and charity. You can build a financially secure future without limiting yourself in the present or alienating everyone you love with your behavior.
