They may seem outdated, sometimes too strict, but the advice of our grandmothers is not just a rule of good manners. It is a whole world in which elegance, self-respect and attention to detail reigned. Let's remember the same lessons that shaped more than one generation.
My grandmother's advice went something like this: “Look for happiness not in a man, but in yourself. If you can't make yourself happy on your own, no man will help you.”
I still remember something like: “I want to see your diploma first, but the great-grandchildren will wait.”
And my grandmother tried to teach me how to chop wood. She said I would need it if I were to marry an officer.
My grandmother taught me that wearing dark-colored shoes during the day was a sign of bad manners! My grandmother would even take out the trash in the hallway, not in a bathrobe, but in a dress, with her hair done and lips painted, and when going outside, a hat (different ones depending on the weather), gloves, a handbag, a scarf, and an umbrella were mandatory.
And my grandmother told me: men, when entering a room, should take off their hats. And when sitting at a table and talking, even more so. Take your hands out of your pockets, remove your elbows from the table, and don't sit on the table or windowsill.
My grandmother taught me about posture as a child. Lean your back against the wall so that your shoulder blades touch, and put a book on your head. And try to walk so that the book doesn't fall. You get used to walking with a straight back.
My great-grandmother said that wearing a sundress, except at the dacha, was indecent, that in the city you should wear a summer dress, and that it was considered rude to go to the theater in red.
Our grandmothers taught us many things: to mow, rake hay, grow a garden and livestock, look after the younger ones, sew, knit and chop wood. They instilled in us from childhood: when you wash the floors, don't leave puddles, otherwise your husband will be a drunkard, make the bed well so that family life is happy. If the thresholds and porch are always clean, there will be many admirers. Don't eat from a knife, you will be grumpy.
My grandmother taught me to speak softly and laugh softly. Loud talking and laughing was considered very vulgar.
At the table, when I ate, my great-grandmother would put a book under my arm so that my elbows were always pressed to my body, and only my hands with the instruments moved, and there was no temptation to put my elbows on the table. I still remember her cry: “Remember your back!”
My grandmother worked on a collective farm all her life. She taught us that a person should have one family and for life. She married a stranger at the age of 18. She lived with him in love and harmony for 71 years. She also taught that the house and the surroundings should always be clean. Clothes should be everyday and festive, washed, ironed… And everything should be done properly, slowly, so that it turns out neatly. And you should speak quietly, clearly, clearly, and most importantly, love people and not judge anyone.
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