The fashion for total awareness, stories about detox retreats somewhere closer to nature and stories about how giving up an evening glass of wine suddenly opened a person’s chakra of success. Bright, smiling sobriety sells well. But giving up alcohol is not a ticket to the Garden of Eden. It is simply a step back from the abyss.
No one is in a hurry to tell us what exactly we will have to do with this new normality when the holiday is over and the guests disperse. Watching those who have decided to tie the knot, I see a completely different, non-cinematic scenario.
Anesthesia bill
For a long time, someone's body has been held on by their word of honor and alcohol anesthesia. What was previously successfully ignored or filled with another portion on the weekend, suddenly gives voice in sobriety. It turns out that a person has a pancreas. And a liver. And a nervous system, which now resembles a bare wire.
Instead of the promised glow and freshness, you will have to spend time in hospitals, trying to repair what has been broken for years. And suddenly your weight starts to increase, because the body will demand to replace the calories from empty degrees with something else. And here the gym becomes not a tribute to fashion or a desire to take a good selfie, but a banal necessity, just to not turn into jelly.
Vacuum in the notebook
Adult friendships are often built on shared rituals. Take away the rituals and you'll find that there's simply nothing to talk about soberly with half of these wonderful and fun people. They haven't become bad, the rules have just changed.
Watching my friends who have completely given up alcohol, I see the same thing: they gradually become distant. Because sitting with a mineral water in a bar, listening to others get louder and repeat the same jokes, is a so-so pleasure. In the end, the circle of communication narrows, because making new friends is like looking for true love. Theoretically possible, but in practice difficult.
Anatomy of boredom
No one warns that the first months without doping are endless, viscous, almost physically tangible boredom. Previously, the evening had a clear script, emotions were guaranteed to be delivered to the bloodstream in a matter of minutes. Now time stretches like a rubber band.
The brain, accustomed to quick dopamine injections, becomes resentful and demands a holiday. Suddenly it becomes clear that one must entertain oneself on one's own, making a conscious effort.
Sometimes you look at a person who suddenly starts obsessively collecting vintage records or sawing something out of wood in the garage, and you realize: this is not a sudden awakening of talent. This is simply an attempt not to go crazy from the silence in their own head.
Change of scenery
The human brain is a rather lazy and cynical mechanism. If one channel of instant gratification is blocked, it will immediately start searching for another.
Someone switches to eclairs, someone to sports betting or endless scrolling of news until their eyes are red. You can often see people from one extreme flying into the other. They become radical fanatics of a healthy lifestyle, rub their knees in marathons or go headlong into religion.
The mechanism of addiction does not disappear, it simply dresses up in a socially acceptable costume, creating the illusion of control and giving at least some vector of movement.
Existence on a schedule
Perhaps the main dissonance is that giving up alcohol does not solve any of life's problems. It only removes the troubles that alcohol itself created. And the basic reality remains unchanged.
Rent, midlife crises, difficult relationships, the general backdrop of world news — all of this is not going anywhere. Before, you could press the “pause” button and hide for the evening. Now you have to face this unpredictable, sometimes downright lousy reality with an open visor every morning.
Sometimes it seems that this is the hardest fact to bear: the realization that you will still have to pay full price for years of running away from life.
But in this cold, disillusioned honesty with oneself, perhaps there is a chance for some semblance of peace. Not that glossy happiness from the picture, but simply the normal life of an adult who has finally decided not to look away.
Share
Subscribe to UkrMedia on Telegram.
⚡ Readers' Pulse
Which is better: a bright illusion in a glass or cold, boring and lonely sobriety?
2 people have already voted. Join the discussion.
💎 Sobriety is strength 🧟 This is gray boredom 🤔 I have my own experience
☝️ First choose your position
✏️ Write a comment
📊 Mind map
💎 Sobriety is strength 100% 🧟 It's gray boredom 0% 🤔 I have my own experience 0% 💡
The discussion is just beginning. Be the first to comment!
Comments
New ones first ↕
There are no comments yet. Be the first!